She works hard for the money

I was feeling insecure.

Starting from December and up to a few days ago, my year wasn’t starting well. Three projects that I’d been wanting to do all got the boot for various reasons. The first one, an 8-month consultancy, I declined because the budget was way too low for the type of job and for the expected output. I let that go because I (smugly) reasoned that I wasn’t desparate. Had they asked me now, I wonder how different my answer would be. The second project wasn’t as long as the first, but it was big in scope. A bit high profile because it involved the government. The proposal I submitted was already approved in principle. However, too much time spent on procrastination and waiting for something to happen led to its ultimate demise. The bilateral agency funding this project was closing shop here in Cambodia this month so there was no more time to carry out the project. Ergo, cancellation.

The third (and my last hope) was even smaller than the two projects I have mentioned but it is something I enjoy doing: facilitating a strategic planning workshop of a community-based organization. I was recommended by a friend to this new client and they asked me to come for an interview. I did and I think the interview went very well. There was rapport between us. They liked my training proposal and told me they’d confirm in a week. When the time came they told me that the planned strategic planning workshop had been postponed indefinitely. This happened on the first week of January. I was deeply disappointed.

For the good part of 2007’s last quarter I’d only been accepting teeny-tiny projects. I imagined myself on a break from work. But the truth was I never did well on vacation. Boredom quickly sets in and after a while I would feel the urge to do something or else, I’d go mad!

As the year drew to a close I got distracted by the holiday celebrations with my Filipino friends in this christmas-less country. I was looking forward to working again, counting on the two (at that time) possibilities that kept my options wide open. As the new year began and the projects started falling through my fingers like water, I began to get worried. I had bills to pay, after all: rent & utilities, my housekeeper, small loans, my credit card & life insurance (in Manila), etc. I felt I was slowly and uncontrollably descending deeper into penury.

Okay, okay, I might be exaggerating a bit here. I was living on my remaining money in the bank, which I have always tried to keep in there for the longest time. But desparate times call for desperate measures. I told myself that I just need to weather this drought and it won’t last longer than it has. After all, I had more than 3 years of continuous and steady stream of projects and jobs. What’s a few weeks of nerve-wracking and gut-wrenching unemployment? 

And then, a week ago, a friend called to ask me if I were busy, to which I responded with a resounding ‘NO!!!’. Shortly thereafter I found myself busy again, which was a delightful change. And then a day later I got a call from a colleague who works for a bilateral agency and she asked if I were available for a short, quick job. I said yes and we agreed to meet the next day and I got the job! As soon as I finished the first gig for my Filipino friend, I started right away in the next gig and now I am almost done with it. I just took a break from technical writing to do some, well, non-technical writing. I hope this is the start of another busy year.

I’m baaaaaaaaaack!!!

postscript:

I realized I need to back-track a bit. When I said that I wasn’t working from November to most of January, I was being truthful. I wasn’t doing any consulting, which has been my job since 2004. There’s a big ‘but’ in that statement, though. Because I was doing something else. I was, with two new friends, busy putting together the first issue of SQUARE–a magazine targetting young Cambodians. There’s not a lot of money in this. The company that publishes it is really just a small, start-up company but with lots of determination and talent. Our first issue came out in January and we are already at work on the second issue, coming out in March.

We received a lot of positive feedback on this issue, which certainly made all the hard work worth it. I just wish that the positive feedback translates into real income (money from advertising, sales, etc.) soon. I’m proud to present to you my baby: