Michaela

Darkly Dreaming

Saw her face

Right as rain

Pink in places

Daughter in arm

Vividly vital

Though I knew

In my heart:

Here is Death–

In living color

Surround sound;

Here is Death–

By my door

Waiting, quiet,

Then I wake up.

phnom penh 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

These endless wranglings

tula ng pag-ibig

tila kay-tagal na

nating nagtutunggali.

mahabang panahon

na ang inubos nitong

paligsahan ngunit

wala pang nananalo.

matagal nang pagod

ang isip at katawan

subalit di ako susuko

at alam kong ganito rin

ang laman ng ‘yong isip.

dito lang yata tayo

pinalad na magkatugma.

adik sa pakikipagbuno.

at alerdyik sa pagsuko.

para kay Mai

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Push and pull

Tug-of-War

With each step

You pull at the rope

That binds us,

Hoping to end up

With the longer bit.

But, unrelenting,

I pull with matching,

If not more, strength,

Hungry to take back

My own half of rope.

I’m not sure

When one of us will land

Past that line or not–

These baby steps have

To lead somewhere.

If not, then what

Could’ve we been doing

All along? Playing

The couple, disguised

As bitter opponents?

for Mai

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Words like motes

puwing

nalango ako sa tamis at bango

ng binitiwang salita’t pangako

di tuloy napansin ang kawalan

nila ng malalim na kahulugan

salitang maganda ngunit hungkag

ang matagal din sa aki’y bumulag

hanggang umihip ang hangin

at sila’y tinangay palayo sa akin

na tila mga butil ng puwing

svay rieng, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Speaking in tongues

conversation

i love words

i love saying them

i love writing them

echo, butterfly, affection

cirrus, fugue, cerulean

thirst, forever, devotion

i love your words

they stir my imagination

they arouse my emotion

care, promises, food,

bordeaux, kohl, trance,

lick, fuck, shoot, fly away

i only wish that our lives

do not turn into an endless

list of words standing for

actions, procrastinations for

decisions, transient desires

for feelings and real needs

i love the word ‘forever’

but my dear, you have to admit,

forever is such a lonely word

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Shot glass poetry 5

ang nakalimutan ng puso

pinilit kong limutin ka;

buong akala’y lumaya na

mula sa iyong alaala.

mali ako, hindi pa pala.

nagpapatay-malisya;

akala nila’y nakausad na

tungo sa piling ng iba.

subalit ako’y nandito pa.

lasing, at nag-iisa:

buong akala’y napalis na

sa puso ang pagsinta.

mali ako, hindi pa pala.

phnom penh, 2008

copyright: Michael P. De Guzman

Shot glass poetry 4

what the body remembers

tonight i wanted to drown my fears

in glasses that clinked with ice

and swirled with potent liquids;

tonight i wanted to become lost

in the music invading my ears

and coaxing my body to dance;

tonight i wished to stop recalling

all the bad that has happened

and all the pain that i had felt;

tonight i drank, sang and danced

but the more i did these things

the more my body remembered–

your smell, the texture of your skin,

the weight of your legs, your taste,

there’s no escape, and no release.

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Shot glass poetry 3

Napagtanto Kagabi

Larawan ka ng ligayang

Di mapapalubog

Tuwing ika’y gumagalaw

Sa saliw ng tugtog,

Tuwing ika’y humalakhak

Sa buwan na bilog.

Nawa’y lagi kang ganito

Araw man o gabi

Dahil nasilip ang lalim

Ng iyong pighati,

Dahil nabatid ang lihim

Sa likod ng ngiti.

Mabato ang mga daan

Tungo sa ligaya

Mahirap ang paglalakbay

Pag laging mag-isa,

Ngunit maraming karamay

Kahit mukhang wala.

muli, kay King

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Shot glass poetry 2

Flight of the Neurons

or, seeing the universe in a bottle of whiskey

I could tell by the way

Your smile bloomed on your face,

By the weight of your arm

As it landed on my right shoulder,

By the way your words

Flowed like water out of your mouth,

That you were inebriated.

And the only way for me

To accept and return that smile,

For me to let you invade

My well-guarded personal space,

For me to comprehend and

Engage in this dizzying discussion,

Was to be in the same state.

So in this night it came to pass

That between us the bottle got

Passed, its contents poured

Into squat glasses with cubes

Of ice, the whiskey sparkling

At the precise moment when

Brain cells turned into stars.

again, for King

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman

Shot glass poetry

Usapang Lasing

Nang lumalim ang gabi kasabay

Ng ating kalasingan, natagpuan

Ko bigla na tayo’y nagtutunggali

Kahit di batid kung ano ba talaga

Ang pinaglalabanan, tumaas

Ang mga boses, nagsalimbayan

Ang mga opinyon na tila kidlat

Na gumuguhit sa kalangitang

Binabagyo, naghalo ang tatlong

Wika sa pag-ikot nitong usapan–

Hanggang sa kusang nahinto

Ang palitan ng salita at ikaw ay

Natahimik, waring nalukuban

Ng walang hanggang pagod.

Hatid ng umaga ang pagkalimot,

Dahil nang muli kang makita’y

Nagbalik ang palitan ng ngiti’t

Mga biruan, at ang karugtong

Ng ating tunggalia’y sasapit uli

Marahil sa pagsayad ng alak

Sa sikmura at sa pag-akyat

Ng mga espiritu sa ating utak.

para kay King

phnom penh, 2008

copyright Michael P. De Guzman